Alien portal

I wake up feeling like I hadn't slept ..I go downstairs and drink lots of coffee while surfing the Internet. Web pages go streaking by like a NASCAR race ..disappearing down avenues of cyber space ~ click ~ a pipeline of light takes me to a satellite connection ~ click ~ ultra violet rays hurl me into the infinite ether ~ click ~ fractal patterns go spinning by ..unraveling out of sight ~ click ~ a metallic orb looms ahead ..flashing letters that form the words: cosmic connection click here ~ click~ a portal door blows wide open revealing a brilliantly colored, luminescent universe ..I pass through going ..how did I get here? On the other side an alien's face appears ..Its words bypass my auditory system and go directly into my center for word recognition: "zzzipperishhh .. gibberishhh ..licorisshh ..carnivorishh ..ahhh haaa, English ..! Greetings Earthling ..how may I be of assistance ?”